Do Muslims use the washroom like Americans?

Have you ever been next to a Muslim on the bus or train and wondered to yourself "wow do they ever bathe"?  This is a very valid question that we here at Muslims are just like us had been wondering for some time.  We have been in pursuit of one particular subject for some time, ID # 7783, primarily to answer this exact question.

I first came upon ID # 7783 earlier this summer when I was traveling to the market for some groceries.  Using the subtle art of subterfuge, I engaged in conversation with the specimen to diagnose what his stance on this matter may be.  Unfortunately when he opened his moth to speak to me, the overwhelming stench turned my stomach sour in a second.  It was as if decades of Thai food and burnt hair had been in his mouth.  I was not able to engage in further conversation and quickly vacated the bus, several stops prior to my destination. 

I did not give up on ID # 7783 at that point however, no, I followed him home and have been watching him for some time.  This recent snap shot that I was able to take, unknowingly to him, exposes that he does in fact have such toiletries like, Mouthwash, Deodorant, Cologne, Toilet Paper, Hand Soap, and even Tooth Paste.  Perhaps that day I first encountered this specimen, he had been eating Thai food, and that would attribute to the awful stench that came from his mouth. 

I look forward to monitoring this specimen as I was able to set up a surveillance rig in his laboratory.  We hope that this will help to uncover the hygiene habits of the Muslim male.  As far as we know, they make something in the washroom called "Wudu" at various times throughout the day, "why" you ask, we do not know yet, but we hope to unravel that mystery as well.

Reported 10/30/2011 -  Donald Rascal

What is Muslims are just like us?

Here at Muslims are just like us, we are dedicated to examining and discovering the truth behind those crazy Muslims we read so much about in the paper and see on the news.  Certainly they can not all be bomb wielding, freedom-hating terrorists, or can they?

Our goal is to expose Muslims for what they really are. How are we going to do that? We are going to do some undercover photojournalism of some unsuspecting Muslims to discover how they actually live day to day.  We are going to travel deep into the nest of these "Muslims", just like Steve Irwin, observing them in their natural habitat so as to get the honest to God truth!

One may ask, "who are you and how are you capable of such a feat"?  This is a great question.  We are a group of dedicated individuals who are trying to protect the borders of America from these Mohammedans and their goal to take over America with Sharia Law.   Fox News and CNN have been telling us for TEN years now that there is an eminent threat, so we decided that we would take a closer look at these strange and unusual foreigners in our country.

We here are made up of retired FBI agent Donald Rascal, who worked in both the Initial Gulf War, and the most recent.  At his side at all times is photo journalist Lexi Cunningham, known for her surreal shots of tourists taking pictures of the strangest of artifacts in American culture.

Come along on our daring adventure into the unknown as we discover, are Muslims just like us!  We will leave no stone unturned, no cave unexplored, and no Muslim undiscovered.  We are dedicated to truth, justice, and the American way!